Looking back 16 years ago when i became a mom to a cute 3.15kg baby boy. I was still in the operation room half ceaser. Its was a scary moment when i heard doctors talking to each other “the baby not crying!” faster..do something”! I heard foot step running..and within 10 minute i can hear a baby crying. I was relieved, everyone was relieved. My baby boy is so chubby and i remember his smell the first time i hold him..smell so nice. My Sean Matthew is my first born…and thats is the start of my journey of being a mother.
Something is not right
First time having a baby of my own but not a first time taking care of baby. We are the generations who become nanny to our relatives, taking care of our younger cousins during school holiday.
There is something not right when a child became too active, too sensitive and doesnt want to play with other kids. As a mother this worries me.
I know I have to do something, even though I was being denial. Just imagine when you are in a party, he will just scream just because he dont get what he wants or scream and lie down on the floor in a restaurant because he thought the people in front was looking and talking about him. That is just a two examples of many situations we faced.
It was embarrasing, stressful and i might be into depression (didnt get myself check). As i know its not normal to have feeling to jump from my 2nd floor apartment, crying without reason and became worse after my second child was born. I was mentally, emotionally and physically exhausted.
The Blaming Game
The cozy home became war zone. Love became hate. There are nothing good to see anymore, everything focus on the bad and the wrong.
Then I wanted to do something different, i want to change!we want change!
To understand something you need to learn about it. Mr. Google has become my good buddy and references. Seeking informormation and knowledge from parenting, special needs and self development. How to control stress? understand emotions….and how to be a good mother?…”change anything you want to be with NLP”.
I packed my bag and took my NS-NLP Certification in KL for 7 days in 2010. Its a complicated things but i slowly understood the way it works once i applied it in my life..to myself and my family.
I didnt stop learning, attending seminar and courses related to special needs and children to be general. Outdoor Play and Certified Teacher Yoga for Kids.
After attended seminars, I then realized there are NLP technique being used in other therapy but the only different is the terms they used.
I did my own research and applied it my son, from how to control his tantrum/meltdown, how to relax, how to get ready for big event and so on.
There are so many Certified NLP Trainers in Malaysia and even Master NLP Trainer in Sabah. I am not sure how many can use their NLP knkwledge to help you as what i did is all through my own experience.
Do check out this Tips to get Autism ready for social gathering.
Should you need my assistant, please do not be hesitate to email me at firstname.lastname@example.org
Life is full of ups and down, its full of surprises. You want your life the way you plan it to be but as much as you want things to be, sometimes it will not go as plan. Even your relationship with someone you love are beyond your control, as much as you want your relationship to last it might ended for certain reason. You don’t want that but if it happens life goes on.
If things dont go as planned, dont be disappointed, maybe God has different plan for you.
You feel its hard to move on because you have not forgive what had happend in your past. You need to make peace with yourself, don’t blame yourself or other people for what happened.
To be at peace with yourself is to be better equipped to face the world. To be at peace is to be more contented with your lot in life.
The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong. Mahatma Gandhi
According to The National, holding a grudge will make you sick. Constant bitterness can make a person ill – so says a research team from Canada’s Concordia University in Montreal, Quebec. “Persistent bitterness may result in global feelings of anger and hostility that could affect a person’s physical health,” reveals Carsten Wrosch, a professor in psychology, who has spent 15 years looking at the side-effects of negative emotions.
The ability to forgive is crucial for you to move on from the past, and find peace within yourself.
If you not willing to forgive and make peace with yourself, you will create a feeling of hate which will be a stone in your heart, hardening each day and giving you lot of pain. Sometimes we keep hating someone we forget what they did to us.
To forgive is and easy words but not an easy task. Not many people willing to forgive but if you willing to forgive and let go, you must be proud of yourself.
Forgiveness is easing the chokehold emotion has on you and it opens you up to healing, growth and possibility.
Before you forgive anyone in the world, forgive yourself first, make peace with your past. Be thankful for the experiences you were given.
Occupation wellness is the dimensions that recognize your personal satisfaction and enrichment through work. A person who is doing is a person is doing exactly what they want to do in life and is comfortable and content with their personal and financial situation and future plans has a very healthy state of occupational wellness.
It is the ability to achieve a balance between work and leisure in a way that promotes health, a sense of personal satisfaction and is (for most people) financially rewarding. Our attitude and ability to effectively deal with work, school, and career goals greatly affect wellness, performance, interactions with others and overall success.
ENHANCING OCCUPATIONAL WELLNESS AT THE WORKPLACE
For employer, there are many ways that you can support work-life balance in your workplace even with a limited budget. Start by finding out from your employees what wellness program options would support their work-life balance. Then back up your wellness program with policies, encourage employees to make use of your workplace wellness options and affirm that tapping into these options will not negatively affect their employment with you.
As employee, you can also enhance occupational wellness at workplace, with the existence policies in your management or creating your own list in making your workplace an enjoying place to work at. Here are few strategies you can do to enhance occupational wellness at the workplace;
Flexible Work Arrangements
Flexible work arrangement benefited both employee and the organization. It gives their staff to choose on which time suits their staff, for example, a time option 7.30a to 4.30pm or 8.30am to 5.30pm. As employee, you can choose which time suits your well. Some organizations, such as non-profit organizations let their staff works from home and only have discussion twice a month.
Learn and Grow
Most organizations offer on-site seminars and workshops on topics such as stress, healthy living, communication styles, etc. and encourage their employees to further studies. Take this opportunity to learn and grow. The more you learn the more valuable you are to the organization and more opportunity open for you.
Be Friendly and Understanding
You are spending 8 hours a day, exactly 40 hours in a week. A good relationship with colleague and management will helps you enjoy your days at work without being stressful. Being friendly and understand each individual at your workplace helps in performing your work better, and furthermore your colleagues are your second family. You can share problem that is related to your work and share ideas on what can produce productivity at work. Talking about other colleague or management should be avoided, as this can gives a negative impact for you and your performance. Don’t compare yourself with other staff but learn to be a good teamwork.
Take a Break (How about hiking?)
Anyone can easily get stress with work but you should learn to take things easy. If you feel stress, take a break. It is advisable to take a break from work.
Start with a walk in the park with your family. You can try other activity such as cycling, hiking or mountain climbing. These activities helps you to get in touch with nature, fresh air, awesome views, surrounded by the sounds and smells of nature. According to medical studies, hiking is good for body and mind.
According to Harvard Medical School, benefit of hiking can increase your mood and healthy heart. Hiking can benefit brisk walking, hiking is a good way to improve your cardiovascular fitness, particularly if your route includes some hills, which will force your heart to work harder. Taking a hike on the slightly uneven surface of a trail also provides a natural way to engage the core muscles in your torso and to hone your balance skills.
You can start hiking somewhere nearby to you or can get some experts to helps you to get into the adventure tour. You can bring your family cycling, hiking and other activities. Awesome quality time with your family and great way to escape from the office work.
There is abundance of challenges and obstacles in trying to achieve and maintain a healthy state of occupational and other dimensions of wellness. It can be hard to feel comfortable and secure in a workplace that is impacted by the state of this difficult economy. There will always challenges in the workplace, disagreement with customers, colleagues and bosses but you need to learn to stay focus.
Staying focused on achieving a proper balance with your career, health, relationship, family and personal satisfaction as proper balance will help you produce and project your best performance. Reprogram your mind and your body to bring out the best in you. Don’t be afraid to change and make small improvements in all areas of your life.